A man called Noah (Russel Crowe) is chosen by his world’s creator to undertake a momentous mission to build an ark with his wife, Naameh (Jennifer Connelly), and their family before an apocalyptic flood cleanses the world. However, the king, Tubai-cain (Ray Winstone), and his followers try to attack and take over the ark in order to survive.


Now it’s been a film I’ve been wanting to see for a while. I’m not saying I am very religious man or believer but I wanted to see how someone – in this case the director, Darren Aronofsky – would interpret this story. Firstly, in this film there are these things called the watchers who are angels that have done wrong and been sent down to earth. However, when they crashed down on earth they turned into the watchers – a sort of stone-human creature (think of a transformer but made out of stone and rocks). At first, I was kind of like “this is from the bible, right?” because it seemed a little out of place and yet as the film went on the concept of it strangely worked. 

In Noah’s family there is Noah, Naameh and their three sons; Shem (Douglas Booth); Ham (Logan Lerman); and Japeth (Leo McHugh Caroll). Oh and they saved a girl years ago called Ila (Emma Watson) who sort of becomes their daughter although she and Shem sort of become an item. Anyway, after seeing a vison from the creator, Noah tells his family what he saw and that Earth will be flooded and everyone will die in order to remove the horror on this planet. If Noah kept his mouth quiet in this film when Tubai-cain arrived then nobody apart from Noah’s family would no about the reason for the ark and there wouldn’t have been a massive fight when the flood started. However, with them soon-to-be the only survivors, all Ham asks his father is that they bring two girls onto to the ark so that in the future they can be a wife for himself and Japeth and each son can start a family – it makes sense (Shem has Ila). However, Noah says no and after wondering to the camp, Ham finds a girl who becomes friends with. When the rain starts and the villains are going to attack the ark, Ham and this girl called Na’el (Madison Davenport) run to the ark. Nevertheless, something happens and the girl who Ham likes gets hurt and Noah arrives but instead of helping the girl too, he just takes Ham away and the girl is trampled on by the angry mob. Now (after explaining all that), my problem here is that at the beginning of the film we see Noah as a child and he is the last son of good will and everyone else is filled with evil. If Noah is the last good man and yet has a wife, then she must have be ‘evil’ and eventually became ‘good’. Why, we even see the family save Ila – a young stranger girl who technically would have been ‘evil’ – who they then look in and made her become a good person. My point is if they can allow these two females to become good and right their sins then why didn’t Noah do the same for the girl Ham liked? A bit of pffft moment in the film.

Plus after the flood starts, Tubai-cain manages to sneak onto the boat. However, with his injured leg and unable to walk he stays hidden for ages and eats some of the animals that are asleep (the family used some herbs to put them asleep for the journey and woke up when they found land) – and no they didn’t even arrive in two by two, yes there was two of each animal but they sort of arrived together and hurried on the ark. Anyway, Tubai-cain stayed in the same spot for months whilst they were in the ark. I tend to think of the reality of this sometimes and I know will think of it and not say it but I am going to say it: where the heck did he go to the toilet if he couldn’t move and how did he move it all? It doesn’t make sense really.

As the months on the ark go by, Ila is pregnant (Shem is the father) and all of a sudden Noah becomes Norman Bates and goes all pyscho as he believes the creator has told him they cannot carry the human species on and must all naturally die. Noah states if the baby is a boy that’s fine, but if the baby is a girl apparently they have to kill her. It’s not a feminism thing. Noah believes the girl will become pregnant and the human race will carry on when it shouldn’t. Uh, hello! If you and your family are the only survivors and you want to kill the girl because a man might have sex and create a human being, you are basically claiming that, providing we don’t think that her own father – Shem – would do it, either Ham or Japeth – her uncles – will have sex with her in the future. Slightly wrong and disturbing that this plot has occurred in the film.

Anyway, I hate to spoil it but Noah in the end does not kill the baby girl…or the other baby girl because Ila had twins! (CUE EASTENDERS TUNE). However, the end of the film sees Noah telling the baby girls to in the future have babies and replenish the human life with only good people. Once again, uh hello! As they are the only survivors, Noah is basically now giving his consent for his granddaughters to have sex within the family. Well, actually only Japeth as Ham gone to travel around Earth and leaves the family behind.

I want to make it clear I am only stating what the film is saying and do not like the idea of what I have noted above. I find it slightly disturbing and weird.

The concept of some parts of the film, such as the watchers and the way the family keeps all the animals together in one ark in peace, are quite good. I also like the cinematography of the reaction of life and the sunset view. However, there are parts that seem wrong and ruin parts of the film.

Oh and Anthony Hopkins stars as Methuselah – Noah’s grandfather – who sort is a less entertaining/funny human version of Rafiki from The Lion King.

Noah: 6.0/10


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